Teacher says I am missing the stuff below. I do not have a thesis statement…

My suggestions were to improve the critical analysis issues. The details you currently have are great.
Ideas: http://www.forbes.com/sites/85broads/2014/06/30/why-companies-should-focus-on-working-parents-not-just-moms/#47c591997c67
You have some good information in your previous draft, so don't toss it all out!
The issue is that your paper is simply focusing on why being a working mother is stressful. The problem with this is there is no "So what" or potential solutions where you ca really ply your critical analysis skills.
Here's why "so what?" is important. Being a parent is stressful. Being an employee is stressful. Being a person is stressful. Stress alone is not a justification for change.
Why is it important for our whole society that we support working mothers more? Your paper seems to be focusing on general definitions of stress, and why working mothers experience it. My biggest suggestion is to focus on why we as a society as a whole will benefit from supporting working parents more in their efforts. By not doing so, what do we lose? Don't think of this in personal terms, like laying more of the load on other employees who will resent it and damage their own personal time and stress levels, or putting the impetus on small employers who cannot afford to support the families of working parents. Research and examine ways we can collectively engage with this issue, that can arguably benefit more than the individual, working parent.


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